Kerry K asked:


Y’know,’ said the Scotsman, ‘I still prefer the pubs back home in
Glasgow…There’s a little bar called McTavish’s. Now the landlord there goes
out of his way for the locals so much, that when you buy 4 drinks he will buy
the 5th drink for you.’

‘Well,’ said the Englishman, ‘at my local, the Red Lion, The barman there will
buy you your 3rd drink, after you buy the first 2′

‘Ahhhhh, that’s nothing’, said the Irishman. ‘Back home in Dublin there’s Ryan’s
Bar.

Now the moment you set foot in the place they’ll buy you a drink, then another,
all the drinks you like.
Then when you’ve had enough drinks, they’ll take you upstairs, and see that you
get laid.

‘All on the house’

The Englishman and Scotsman immediately scorn the Irishman’s claims, but he
swears every word is true.

‘Well,’ said the Englishman ‘did this actually happen to you?’

‘Not me meself, personally, no,’ said the Irishman….’But it did happen to me
sister!’

dididdleydihi asked:


The Pubs Back Home

Y’know said the Scotsman, I still prefer the pubs
back home in Glascow. there’s a little bar called
McTavish’s. Now the landlord there goes out of his way for the locals so much that when you buy 4 drinks he will buy the 5th drink for you.

Well, said the Englishman, at my local, the Red Lion, the barman there will buy you your 3rd drink after you buy the first 2.

Ahhhhh, that’s nothing, said the Irishman. Back home in
Dublin there’s Ryan’s Bar. Now the moment you set foot in the place they’ll buy you a drink, then another, all the drinks you like. Then when you’ve had enough drinks they’ll take you upstairs and see that you get laid. All on the house.

The Englishman and Scotsman immediately scorn the Irishman’s claims. But he swears every word is true.
Well, said the Englishman, did this actually happen to
you? Not me meself, personally, no, said the Irishman….

But it did happen to me sister.

Mr Pothead ******** Master asked:


An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin , orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn.
When he finished all three, he comes back to the bar and orders three
more. The bartender says to him, ‘You know, a pint goes flat after I
draw it; It would taste better if you bought one at a time.’

The Irishman replies, ‘Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in
America , the other in Australia , and I’m here in Dublin . When we all
left home, we promised that we’d drink this way to remember the days
we all drank together.’

The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.

The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar and always drinks the same
way: he orders three pints and drinks the three pints by taking drinks from each of them in turn.

One day, he comes in and orders two pints. All the other regulars’ in
the bar notice and fall silent.

When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender
says, ‘I don’t want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your great loss.’
The Irishman looks confused for a moment, then the light dawns in his
eye and he laughs.

‘Oh, no,’ he says, ‘Everyone is fine. It’s me……..I’m driving!’

duckisback asked:


An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn.

When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more.

The bartender asks him, You know, a pint goes flat after I draw it, it would taste better if you bought one at a time.

The Irishman replies, Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in America, the other in Australia, and I’m here in Dublin. When we all left home, we promised that we’d drink this way to remember the days when we drank together.

The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.

The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way. He orders three pints and drinks them in turn.

One day, he comes in and orders two pints. All the other regulars notice and fall silent.

When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, I don’t want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your great loss.

The Irishman looks confused for a moment, then a light dawns in his eye and he laughs. Oh, no, he, says, everyone’s fine. I’ve just quit drinking.

Rainman asked:


An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman were in a pub in downtown New York.
Och, said the Scotsman, Ah still prefer the pubs back home. Why, in Glasgow, there’s a wee bar called McTavish’s. Now the landlord there goes out of his way for the locals so much that when you buy four drinks, he’ll give you the fifth drink for nothing. Well, said the Englishman, At my local, the Red Lion, the barman will buy you your third drink after you’ve bought the first two.
Ahhh, that’s nothin’ said the Irishman. Back home in Dublin there’s Ryan’s Bar. Now the moment you set foot in the place they’ll buy you a drink, then another, all the drinks you like. Then, when you’ve had enough drinks they’ll take you upstairs and see that you get laid. All on the house.
The Englishman and Scotsman immediately poured scorn on the Irishman’s claims – but he swore every word was true.
Well asked the Englishman, Did this actually happen to you?
No, no, not meself, personally, no, said the Irishman. But it did happen to me sister.

Oracle asked:


The Luck Of The Irish

An Irishman an Englishman and a Scot were sitting in a bar.
The view was Fantastic, the beer excellent and the food exceptional.

Y ‘know, said the Scotsman, I still prefer the pubs back home.
Why, in Glasgow there’s a little bar called McTavish’s. The landlord there goes out
of his way for the locals so much that when you buy 4 drinks he will buy the 5th drink
for you.

Well, said the Englishman, at my local, the Red Lion, the barman there
will buy you your 3rd drink after you buy the first 2.

Ahhh, that’s nothin’ said the Irishman. Back home in Dublin there’s
Ryan’s Bar. Now the moment you set foot in the place they’ll buy you a
drink, then another – all the drinks you like. Then when you’ve had enough
drinks they’ll take you upstairs and see that you get laid. All on the house.

The Englishman and Scotsman immediately poured scorn on the Irishman’s
claims.
But he swore every word was true.

Well, said the Englishman, did this actually happen to you?
Not me myself, personally, no, said the Irishman.
But it happened to my sister.